Singleness to Relationship...the Journey that God has Divinely Designed

Song of Solomon 2:7~ “I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, not to stir up or awaken love until it pleases.”

In Fall 2007, I entered the adult world as I left my parents’ home for the first time to live at the University of Alabama at Birmingham.  There was a world of adventures and life changes in front of me. And I was almost one hundred percent sure that one of these life changes was going to be meeting my future husband.  My mom had made the comment frequently as I went through high school that I would most likely meet the man that I would one day marry in college.  So, I arrived with the naïve assumption that everyone in college was happy and in a serious relationship; however, this assumption was quickly suppressed within my first semester as an undergrad. 

I began to realize not only that most people in college were not happy but also that most people were not in relationships.  Unfortunately, this realization did not prevent me from becoming discouraged.  I had never been in a relationship and I began to feel like there was nothing attractive or desirable in me.

Thankfully, God began to bring a few godly women into my life that began to teach me about being content in singleness and thinking of it as a gift from God.  The Lord used these women in my life to reveal that I was searching for an earthly man to fill parts of my life that only God could fill.  I was not fully depending on Him and I certainly was not respecting Him as my Bridegroom.  God began to slowly reveal to me through these women and other friendships that I was creating an impossible standard for man.  As John and Stasi Eldridge wisely state in their book Captivated, “[We] are made for romance, and the only one who can offer it to [us] consistently and deeply is Jesus” (125, changed for emphasis).  I had to be completely filled and satisfied in my intimacy with God before He was going to place a companion in my life.

 

God had been protecting my heart in more ways that I could have imagined, while I was seeking opportunities that would have potentially harmed my heart.  He was giving me the gift of being intimate and personal with him without the distraction of countless relationships. 

Although I continued to struggle at times with my singleness, I began to live a life filled with love from my Heavenly Father and Divine Husband.  Only after experiencing this love was I prepared to enter into a relationship with Israel, who is now my boyfriend.  And guess what?  I met him the day after I graduated college…Our God definitely has a sense of humor.

Now, I can see even more clearly and profoundly the love that God has for me through the love that Israel displays toward me.  However, I know that this appreciation of the Father’s love would not have been possible if I had not found intimacy with Him first. 

My All for His Glory

Hello from Conocoto, Ecuador! 

I have been in Ecuador for over two weeks now.  In many ways the time has flown.  First, let me fill you in on my first two weeks here.  I have already been in three different cities working, Guayaquil, Ventanas, and Quito.  Some work has been very tiring physically and some work has just included having conversations with friends and sharing with them about Jesus and what the Lord has been doing in my life, how He has grown me in the past several months. 

My third night here, I had the opportunity to spend the afternoon and evening with university friends here.  First, went by a girlfriend’s house and had lunch together and caught up.  Then, met up with other classmates at a restaurant.  It was encouraging to hear how God has been working in the lives of several of my classmates.  Then, we went for a walk in a very popular and beautiful part of the city.  It was a great time to get to know one another and encourage one another.  Then, that night, I got on an overnight bus for Guayaquil where I spent the weekend with my Compassion child and his family and friends in the area.  I had the amazing opportunity to meet the new additions to the family (2 baby cousins that were born while I was in the States).  I spent a lot of time getting to know him and his family more.  His mom and I also spent a lot of time encouraging one another and reflecting on the Lord.  Also, that weekend we had the opportunity to travel to a water park on Sunday (Father’s Day).  This was a fun experience and helped me take my mind off of missing my Dad.  And I also had the opportunity to teach Harol how to swim!  Fun and unforgettable memories!

Then, this last week was an especially special experience.  In 2009, God provided an opportunity for me to travel to Ventanas, Ecuador, with a group from Alabama.  I worked with a Pentecostal church and helped start a church plant in a portion of the country called Peaje.  This past week, God again graciously provided an opportunity to work with the same pastor and his wife in the city of Ventanas.  The pastor and his wife are dear friends and it was amazing to get to spend time working alongside one another again.  We spent time in two different small communities in the country called La Reserva and Peaje.  We also spent time visiting with church members who are no longer coming to the church services and sharing the Gospel with others in the community.  It was very encouraging for me to watch and listen as my brothers and sisters here pleaded with their neighbors to consider turning their lives over to the Lord.  The work was extremely challenging, especially seeing how many people are hard-hearted to the Gospel.  We shared about Jesus with so many people and in the end they just looked at us with blank stares.  While reflecting on this, the verses in 2 Corinthians 4:3-4 “ And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to only those who are perishing.  In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.”  So, the labor is hard.  Even at home, in Birmingham, Alabama, the work is hard.  But we have to keep on striving, because like Paul claims in Romans 1:16- “the gospel is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes”.  And PRAISE GOD there was also fruit last week. We witnessed 8 people who after acknowledging their sin and confessing and repenting of it, turned their lives over to the Lord!!!!  This type of fruit of our labor is worth every bead of sweat that pours from our earthly body.

On Sunday, we had the opportunity to go to a river with several of the brothers and sisters from the congregation.  About 20 of us piled into the back of a truck and headed out.  I was the first adult to go all in and get wet.  This shouldn’t be a surprise for those who know me well.  This was a relaxing and enjoyable time after a week of hard work. 

Now, I am back at the orphanage, where I will be until next Saturday.  It has been so enjoyable to see all my kids again and love on them.  When I arrived, I received a hug from the kids that I shared all my meals with last year, basically my family here.  This hug almost brought me to the ground, because imagine 11 kids running at you at once.  But it was amazing!  I have also had the opportunity to play with and love on the kids.  These moments may seem insignificant, but it is crucial for every one of us to feel loved.  It is through this love that we begin to see and understand who God is.  We have also shared many deep conversations with housemoms that I am close to and some of the older girls.  One of the girls is so close to turning her life over to the Lord, and she has a million questions.  Please pray for her with me, I don’t want to share her name for security reasons, just remember her as L.  And even though you don’t know her name, be comforted that our Heavenly Father knows her name and knows her well.

Other prayer requests:

Pray for the leadership of this foundation.  That they would be constantly seeking the Lord and that their highest desire would be to see the Lord glorified and best meet the needs of the kids they serve. 

Pray for the 8 people who turned their lives over to the Lord.  Pray that the Lord would guard their hearts, grow them and teach them.  And pray for those who did not turn their hearts over to Him.  That God would be gracious and soften their hearts so that they might know Him.

Lastly, please pray for my health.  Due to exhaustion and change in climate over the last week I have come down with a bad cold.  And if you can imagine it is hard to rest well when there are so many children who desire to play.

That is all for know, my dear family and friends.  Thank you so much for your prayers and your concern.  I know and see that God is working in huge ways here in Ecuador.  May He be glorified and known by all people in all nations!!!  God bless ;)

The Most Romantic Chase of All Time

So, I know all of you can think of your favorite romantic comedy, song, or novel.  These are the stories that make you long to be a part of an exciting story, a romantic journey.  We all long for an irreplaceable role in these journeys, some more than others, but it is a shared desire.  What would you think if I told you that you have been included in this journey since you took your first breath?  God has been pursuing you fiercely and persistently since you were born.

I was reading the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldridge recently and this comment fascinated me: "Every song you love, every memory you cherish, every moment that has moved you to holy tears has been given to you from the One who has been pursuing you from your first breath in order to win your heart.  God's version of flowers and chocolates and candlelight dinners comes in the form of sunsets and falling stars, moonlight on lakes and cricket symphonies; warm wind, swaying trees, lush gardens, and fierce devotion" (116).  God's way of romancing us and speaking to our hearts has so much more depth and beauty than the pursuit that we wish for from one another.  He is the Creator of romance and He carries out every plan with perfection.  His pursuit of each of us is specific to each individual. He showed me my need for Him and fulfilled these needs in a way unique to me, and He did the same for you.  

It should not be surprising that God also desires to be pursued; He desires for us to come into His presence.  He desires for us to long for Him.  If we look at a familiar passage with this in mind, we may see this.  Let's look at Jeremiah 29:11-14~"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will hear you.  You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place which I sent you into exile."  This is part of the image of God imprinted on our hearts, to be desired and sought by our beloved.  Do not lose sight of this.  Marriage is good, it was also ordained by the Lord.  But for those of us who find ourselves single, we should seek God wholeheartedly so we might find Him!  And know new depths of His love like we have never imagined before.  Then, if the Lord places someone else in our path to accompany on this journey, he or she will only add to this happiness.  There is a difference between having someone adding to your happiness and someone being your source of happiness.  The role of fulfilling our source of happiness belongs to only one person, Jesus.  He is the only one who is worthy to fill this place in our hearts.  

If we keep these things in perspective, our walk with the Lord becomes sweeter with every new day.  These are real struggles though.  If you are walking through difficulty, feel free to comment with prayer requests.  I assure you, you are not facing this battle alone.  

Keep striving onward, brothers and sisters!  May the Lord bless you and keep you.

Your sister,

Amber

Here's a cute picture...thinking of my adorable kids back in Ecuador. How I miss them and cannot wait to be reunited....(one month from this coming Sunday, exciting!)

An Ever-Growing Desire for Another World

There is one earthly struggle that constantly arises in the midst of any situation: pride.  Just when you think that you have conquered this sin, you find yourself on your knees pleading with the Lord to forgive you of being prideful.  This has been a constant struggle for me in this period of life, quite possibly in every period of life, I was just too prideful to admit it.  Part of me believed that I hated sin because God hated sin, but God has graciously shown me how wrong I was.  Throughout this year, the Lord has been breaking me over personal sin and the sin of those around me.  He has made me aware that it is only by His grace and mercy that I find myself with the renewed heart that I have today.  There is nothing good within me apart from God, and he has shown me that on a variety of levels. 

These tough lessons have given me a deeper desire for our heavenly home, this desire is deeper than any I have ever felt.  In the past, I have desired to fulfill my own personal goals more than I desired to go to be with God in His heavenly dwelling.  Selfish, I know.  We all have areas that we need God to grow us in, and this was one of mine.  Now, I do desire to be in the Dwelling Place of the Lord!  How sweet that day will be!  Right now, I am reading through Job.  I have been so encouraged by Job, in that while he suffered unimaginable loss he sought his peace and comfort from the Lord.  Job never denies the Lord's goodness or His sovereignty in every situation.  But it is hard to miss the fact that Job longs for a life that is beyond the one he is living now in his misery.  Every day I am reminded that while I remain in this body, there will be a part of me that desires to rebel against God.  And by His grace, as we grow closer to Him in our walk, this temptation diminishes but it is always there.  For this reason, it becomes even sweeter knowing that when we are finally joined with Him in heaven we will no longer have this flesh!  In our heavenly bodies we will no longer experience pain or suffering, nor will we rebel against our Holy God ever again!  Praise His name!

Revelation 21:4~ He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.

However, although this desire for our heavenly home is ever present on our minds, we must work hard now so that others have the opportunity to join us in God's presence for eternity.  Let this be our encouragement to fight for the salvation of those around us until the Lord takes us home to be with Him!

1 Corinthians 9:24-27~ "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize?  So run that you may obtain it.  Every athlete exercises self-control in all things.  They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.  So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air.  But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified."

Grace and peace to you, my brothers and sisters in Christ!  Take heart, you are not in this battle alone.  You are in the shadow of the Almighty and the front lines are composed of all of us linked together by His strength and might.

Blessings,

Amber ;)

The Prince Charming Illusion

 

From the onset of infancy, most young girls are told, “someday your prince will come” by their loving parents who already have visions about the bright future of their sweet, baby girl.  This simple phrase that may be repeated frequently by parents or other members of immediate family begins to build a sense of need for a significant other in the mind of the young girl.  Although intentions are usually good, the results can be detrimental.  Girls begin to see themselves only as being useful or complete when accompanied by their future soul mate.  And then, when they find themselves single in their late teens or early twenties, it seems as if they are the outcasts of society if they are not yet in a relationship or if they have not at least had a few attempts by going on some dates or by “putting themselves out there.”  Although this may be the norm for our culture, I don’t believe this is what the Lord has intended for us based on Scripture.  Paul actually refers to singleness as a gift (Ephesians 7:6-8) and encourages us to stay that way unless we simply cannot exercise self-control.  I don’t believe Paul is saying here that marriage is bad, but Paul acknowledges his singleness allows him a special intimacy with God.

          

I think we all, especially parents, can learn from Paul’s example.  Shouldn’t we encourage young boys and girls to seek first an intimacy in their relationship with Christ, and teach them that the Lord will provide in the best way for his or her life whether that means having a spouse or not?  This changes the emphasis of things, which is very important because the boy or the girl is no longer the center of attention.  God becomes the center of attention!  This makes us focus on the reason for which we were created, to bring God the most glory.  Then, fathers and mothers could spend more quality time teaching their sons and daughters how to be better men and women of God, not to find satisfaction in the eyes of the opposite sex, but rather to find satisfaction in the eyes of their Heavenly Father.

             
A verse that has taught me a lot regarding this aspect of life is Song of Solomon 2:7, which says, “I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, not to stir up or awaken love until it pleases.”  This verse is found amongst some of the most intimate verses in Scripture, and brings peace to the heart of a young, single woman if she is willing to listen.  From this verse, the Lord has taught me to have confidence in His will for my life.  If He chooses for me to have a husband, He will bring that man into my life in His timing, which is perfect.  If He chooses for me to be single, then, I will have the opportunity to enjoy freely my intimacy with Him for the rest of my years.

A Whirlwind of Adventures...

So, yet again I have not updated my blog in weeks.  Maybe one day I will get a better grip on the whole updating every few days or at least every week, haha. 

Anyways, there have been many changes in life during the past few weeks.  I am now living in an orphanage just outside of Quito in a pueblo called Conocoto called the Henry Davis Foundation.  I am teaching English at the school there with my roomie, Kendra, who is a sweet friend from Washington.  We also tutor kids in the afternoon who are struggling with their English.  I am still learning how to balance these new responsibilities with my responsibilities of going to class and studying so that I will make good grades, which has definitely been a challenge but I know the Lord is having me walk through it for a reason.  However, one thing that is not challenging about the situation is loving the children!!  They are such blessings and they definitely hold a piece to my heart.  These children come from homes where most of the parents are still living but either they were unable to provide for the kids or it was a really bad home situation that the kids had to be removed from.  The Lord has already taught me so much through them.  One thing that I am learning is that even though we might all come from different circumstances, cultures, families, we all have the same basic needs.  We need shelter, food, water, and most of all we need to feel loved and be shown affection.  The last need is one that the kids here are desperate for....or their hearts have been hardened because of a lack in this affection.  It is hard to think about coming from a good home when you look at these kids and know their desire to be loved.

Some verses have also taken new meaning after my experiences here...For example Psalm 139:13-16:
13 For you formed my inward parts;


you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.

14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works;

my soul knows it very well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you,

when I was being made in secret,

intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;

in your book were written, every one of them,

the days that were formed for me,

when as yet there was none of them.

I cried when I read these verses during my time with the Lord one afternoon...because I thought of how the Lord lovingly and carefully wove together each and every single child that lives here and how many of their parents seem to have tossed the meaning of these verses aside.  My heart also hurt because of the fact that many of these kids do not see themselves as magnificent creations of the Creator..they see themselves as unwanted.  And this is a small fraction of a big picture that exists all around the world of people who live as if they are unwanted by family or by society.  Thankfully, the reality is that EVERYONE is wanted...we are all wanted more than we can imagine by the one who knows us best.  And our mission is to make sure that every person is aware of this fact.

Another blessing about living at this particular orphanage is that I can fellowship with two families from my home church, Brook Hills!  The Lord has an amazing way of working all things together for our good...I am amazed every day at the work of His hands!

A few prayer requests:  Please pray for the children here at Henry davis foundation.
Please pray for the house moms that have sacrificed so much to serve these children with ALL of their time.  Pray that the Lord will give them rest and wisdom on how to best raise these children and definitely pray for an immense ammount of love.
Please pray for me as I continue to figure out how to balance my schedule...that I would be wise and not waste the time the Lord has given me here.
May the Lord bless you and keep you and walk through every moment of every day with you.  And may you feel His presence!
Blessings,
Amber =D

A little behind...

So, today I am using some down time to catch everyone up on the activities of the past few weeks.  I had hoped to be a little more disciplined about updating my blog and email updates, but sometimes we can't plan how crazy our schedule will be. 

I am now in Quito, Ecuador.  The city where I will spend the majority of my time as a university student at Pontificia Universidad Catolica.  This past week I had orientation and I am ready to start classes on Monday.  One of the main lessons that the Lord has been teaching me even when just dealing with my university and the way things are run is patience.  It has been a difficult transition coming from a university where EVERYTHING is run like clock work.  Here, I had to go and sit down with someone to register for my classes, where I am used to sitting down at the computer and working my schedule out for myself.  Then, it took three days to actually get everything worked out on the financial side of things.  But the Lord is gracious to teach us when we get frustrated about things like this if we pay attention.

Here is a picture of me on my first day of school at the bus stop: =D

I have also gained an appreciation for public transportation during my time here.  Without the metro bus it would be very costly to get around the city....especially with the amount of traffic that is in this city.

I also want to update you on what has been going on the last few weeks.  One of the biggest highlights that I want to share with you was the opportunity I had a little over a week ago to spend the day with my sponsored child from Compassion, Harol.  I felt so blessed to be able to do all of the activities that we were allowed to do.  First, we went to visit Iguana Park which is a very popular place amongst tourists in Guayaquil.  Then, we spent a few hours playing on every possible playground in Malecon.  After that, we went to a mall to grab some lunch before heading to Harol's house.  I thought I loved this little boy more than imaginable before I met him, but then I realized how wrong I was.  Now I love him even more than that.  He is so precious, and I am thankful for the opportunity God has given me to invest in him.  Before leaving the house, Harol and I played soccer for a little while and then it was time for me to go visit the Compassion center with one of the pastors.  At the Compassion center, I had the opportunity to meet Harol's teacher and see his classroom.  This day has definitely been one of the major highlights of my time here so far, and I hope to go back and visit them again before I come back to the States.

Another highlight from the past few weeks was the opportunity that we had to go and work in Ventanas for a day with a church that I helped plant two years ago on another mission trip.  The original plan had been to spend a week in Ventanas, but because of me getting sick from something I ate we had to rearrange the plans.  However, I know that this circumstance was not out of the control of the Almighty....He knew the plan perfectly.  Also, I am thankful that a majority of my Guayaquil family was able to go with us to preach the Gospel.  We spent the day talking with people who lived on the same street as the church, people I had shared the Gospel with 2 years ago!  Then, we went out to the new church and we visited with some new believers there.  One of the sweetest moments in Ventanas was when I learned that one of the women who came to know Christ while I was there now can call her mother and her sister her sisters in Christ.  They were down at the river washing their clothes when we found them, and I was able to teach them about the Samaritan woman at the well and we talked about how Jesus has called us to serve all people at all times no matter what their past may be and no matter what we may feel like at the time.  It was a sweet time of fellowship.  I also hope to return here during another weekend to spend more time working the harvest fields alongside them.

So, this is just a small piece of what the Lord has been doing in my time here in Ecuador.  I will try to be more regular about updating so that you can hear more stories! 

Ways that you can intentionally pray for me: 1. Pray that I will continue to adjust to the weather here in Quito and that I will continue learning the city quickly.  2. Pray that I will be able to divide my time well between classes and ministry in order to be the most effective.  3. Pray for me as I adjust to being more alone now than I have been.  I have been blessed to have my friend, Bekah, with me this last month as well as my precious family from Guayaquil, but now I will be on my own for the majority of the days. (Please know that I am fully aware of God's presence with me always and that alone is sufficient, but this is still an adjustment that I have to make.)

Thank you for your prayers and the time you have taken to read what God is doing here. 

With love and blessings,
Amber